Christmas Lunch

Assalamualaikum warahmatullah wabarakatuh,

Last Friday, Shaykh Faraz Rabbani came to Cambridge to give a khutbah and then a 1-hour Q & A as he is so famous of Q & A in the Sunnipath.com. I have been told by a few that it is haram to sit in a table with people consuming alcohol, but some of the brothers and sisters in Cambridge do not take this seriously. So I thought it might just be makruh and not haram. Cambridge particularly has this alcohol problem because it is part of the drinking culture and tradition in Cambridge that there are formal halls every week (if you watch Harry Porter, the dinner time is like the formal hall here) and everyone usually bring a bottle of alcohol. Cambridge spends too much money on alcohol! Formal Hall is when the students and fellows meet, it is not compulsory to go but some old colleges include the fee for formal hall into the college bill, meaning that like it or not you have to use the formal hall tickets every term or you are wasting your money paying for it. Alhamdulillah, my college doesn't impose such a rule cause it's a new college, only 50 years old. Basically, throughout my whole life in Cambridge, I only went to one formal hall in my college and one in Trinity Hall. This was because these two formal halls are non-alcohol! Woohoo! It's a long story why these two formal halls are non-alcohol formals. Anyway, my point is, it is really hard to avoid sitting together and have dinner with friends in Cambridge without the presence of alcohol. So, I asked Shaykh Faraz Rabbani regarding this and his answer is that both alcohol and haram food should not be present. But if it is for academic reason that we have to sit in one table, that is fine but it is best to avoid or explain it to the lecturer/supervisor for long term benefits.

This question strikes me cause one of my lecturers invited us to a Christmas Lunch. This lecturer was my viva assessor. After the viva, he invited me to join his monthly research group meeting where many issues are discussed and I have learnt a lot from this meeting. For the next meeting, we will be having a Christmas Lunch right after the meeting. So, the meeting is an academic activity but not the lunch that follows suit. This lecturer likes wine and of course for this festive event, it is going to spoil the atmosphere without it. I didn't know what to decide. Eventually, I wrote an email to him and explain my difficulty.

I don't know how to word this but I hope you can understand.

I appreciate Donna's & your effort in organising this Christmas Lunch. It would
be a fun get-together and I know I'll enjoy the company of everyone in this
group. I am reluctant to decide if I should go because it is strictly forbidden
for me to sit in a social gathering that serves alcohol (there is less benefits
than harms), unless it can be justified as a learning process, not merely a
social function. I don't know if everyone will be having alcohol in this lunch
and I certainly do not wish to spoil the traditional way of Christmas Lunch as
you have wanted. I certainly dislike to make thing difficult for anyone. I hope
you understand my principle. I will definitely come along if alcohol is not
served in this lunch.

Regards,

FATIN

It took me quite a while to compose such an email not sure if this is going to be a bad move. Anyway, he forwarded my email to all the colleagues in this meeting:

Dear All

Please see message below from Fatin. I'm sure we would all happily abstain on
this occasion so that we can have the pleasure of Fatin's company, so shall we
proceed on that basis?

By the way, more Xmas lunch related news - I have just heard that Maria will be
coming over to Cambridge again in that week, so she will also be able to join
us for the lunch!

Best wishes

I didn't expect that he will forward my email to everyone. Anyway, alhamdulillah, alhamdulillah, alhamdulillah, many of them are ready to respect my principle and be tolerant with my religious belief. These are 2 responses from among the colleagues:

Dear Fatin and All,
I will be very happy not to drink any alcohol. I love the term "less benefit
than harm", I certainly do agree with it, even if it's out of its original
context :)
See you all,

Great news about Maria coming to Cambridge!!!
And of course I don't mind the non-drinking rule as long as Fatin join us!
Looking forward to see you all in the lunch!

I nearly cried when I read these emails. Before I came to UK, many have warned me that it is not easy to practise your religion here. I thought it is true, but alhamdulillah, as Islam is becoming more popular (thanks to the media!), people are getting more 'understanding' about Islam (whether it's misunderstanding or understanding), there is always opportunity to tell them what is Islam about. This is also for the sake of long-term cause after this, if they want to have a dinner or whatever kind of get together, they will understand the 'cans' and 'can'ts'.

Also, in the next faculty's end-of-term party, the organiser is ordering halal food! Yay!!! I love Prophet Isa (as) cause his teaching of love and tolerance is still practised by his followers (though not all of his teaching is preserved until now).

Wassalam.

p/s: I bumped into the lecturer later today and he said that he is going to change the venue from the pub to a restaurant. Such an understanding person! Btw, he is a psychologist.