A break which is not a break

Assalamualaikum warahmatullah wabarakatuh,

I will be taking a break from blogging until I submitted my thesis. This a break from blogging but not a break for me! Please make dua for me that I will get my thesis done as soon as possible.

Apology for making such a decision and thank you for your visit.

Wassalam.

An Iraqi wedding

Assalamualaikum warahmatullah wabarakatuh,

I went to Birmingham for an Iraqi wedding this time. I didn't know what to expect because I've never been to any Arab wedding before and this time, I am asked to be the official photographer for the bride's family. Of course there is no payment charged because I am not a skilled and professional photographer, not even a part-time photographer, not even a single photography lesson or course. I was very involved on the day, not just taking photos, but also helping.

My friend basically wanted a female muslim who can help take picture on her wedding because it is a segregated wedding. The bride and all the women in the segregated-women-only hall didn't wear hijab and they wore very beautiful dresses. The bride and bridemaids wore proper English-styled wedding dresses. The groom and male family wore ties and suits and top hats. They were in the men hall.

This couple basically have done their nikkah 2 years ago but according to the Arab tradition, that is what they call engagement, wedding is after this kind of walimah. They are legally husband and wife according to Shari'ah but can't live together according to the tradition. They also have yet registered in the UK law. So, this wedding was really well-planned and run smoothly. The groom is an Algerian.

We went to the function hall at 12pm to set up the halls, one for men and one for women. The bride went straight to the make-up room and stayed there. At 3pm, guests started to come and food was served at 4.30pm. At 6pm, when the bride was ready, she came in with the bridemaids to meet the female guests. She is mashaALLAH very beautiful. She sat on a stage and everyone came up to greet her. Later, arab wedding songs were played and they started dancing. There was this one Egyptian wedding song that stuck in my head until today - 'arisna, 'arisna; 'arustuh, 'arustuh - which means our groom, our groom, his bride, his bride.

At 8pm, all the ladies put on their hijab and jilbab except the bride and the groom's family, to welcome the groom entering the women hall. By then, many guests have gone and only close families and friends left. They took photos and went up the stage for cake-cutting. Then, the bride were dressed by the bridemaids with a few pieces of cloth to cover her so that she could get into the groom's car without letting other men notice her outfit and make-up. They then went straight to a hotel.

By the time we got back home, it was midnight and we were all hungry. The bride too had to ask her brother to buy her dinner at the hotel before we went home. Alhamdulillah, everything went so well and halal because these 2 families are very practising and well-known among the arab muslim community in Birmingham.

I thought my job is just there but the next morning, we went to the hotel to take out-door photos for the couple. It was a lovely day and the garden at the hotel was massive and beautiful. In the evening, they went to their new flat. The husband was so romantic that he asked his sister to decorate the flat with rose petals to welcome her to the new home. There is this tradition for the newly wedded couple to drink milk and eat dates. The next day, they went to Morocco for honeymoon.

May ALLAH bless their marriage with happiness until they enter the Paradise with their offsprings. Amin.

Wassalam.

Paris

Assalamualaikum warahmatullah wabarakatuh,

Yes, I went to Paris last week for a conference but didn't have the time to blog, sorry. Alhamdulillah, everything went well. A sister in London whom I met only twice helped me to contact a French sister who kindly let me stay at her house for FREE for my whole time there. May ALLAH reward them all. Another French sister brought me around Paris and organised a dinner with a group of sisters, mashaALLAH, they are all so nice. I met a group of Malaysians too there. The best part was that I get to enjoy halal French & Italian cuisine which I didn't get while I was in Greece. On my way back on Eurostar, I also get to have halal meal! Can't believe how much the muslims have done in the non-muslim world. 

On my way back to Cambridge, I stayed a night in London and my friend brought me around London. This was the first time I have ever walked around London doing sight-seeing like a tourist who has never been to London. Unfortunately, it was just a short visit and we encountered a parade, apparently to celebrate 'Gay Day'. While getting on the train to go back to Cambridge, I met a group of Cambridge sisters who went shopping in London, alhamdulillah, I have some companies on my journey home.

Seriously, without all these great sisters' help, I would have spending a lot of money for this trip. Their assistance includes:

1. A London sister suggested a French sister who is her housemate to help me regarding accommodation in Paris and in searching the conference location.

2. The French sister found me a sister who is willing to accommodate me for my whole stay in Paris. (And this sister just got married 2 days before I arrived!)

3. 3 sisters in London let me stay at their house the day before my departure to Paris and the day after my arrival in London so that I can get a cheap Eurostar return ticket. 

4. A French sister brought me around Paris, showed me how to use the underground (Metro), organised a dinner with a lot of sisters, and basically be there whenever I needed anything or had any questions about Paris.

5. Another French sister who brought be around Paris to get what I want and sent me to the train station on my last day.

6. 3 Cambridge sisters who were on their way back to Cambridge helped me with my bags and accompanied me home.

Alhamdulillahi rabbil'alamin, that's all that I can say and may ALLAH reward them all.

Alhamdulillah

Alhamdulillah

I'm a muslim

And there's nothing else I wanna be...

(Alhamdulillah - Dawud Wharnsby Ali)

ALLAHU'alam.

Wassalam.

Cambridge Mosque is moving

Assalamualaikum warahmatullah wabarakatuh,

The presence mosque in Cambridge, the one and only tiny little mosque in Cambridge which can accommodate no more than 700 congregations now has found a new site on the same street to build a bigger and purposely-built mosque for more than 1000 congregations. Every Friday, if the men came late, they will have to pray on the street. The new mosque inshaALLAH will provide more and comfortable space for the muslims in Cambridge to pray. MashaALLAH Cambridge has more than 4000 muslims including the students. There are more than 5 places in Cambridge that hold Friday prayer weekly to accommodate everyone. Alhamdulillah, the muslims here try their best to make sure that they observe their prayers here even though the facilities aren't as good as in some muslim countries.

The Muslim Academic Trust led by Shaykh Abdal Hakim Murad has successfully gathered money from generous donors and bought a piece of land on Mill Road to build the new mosque, alhamdulillah. However, the development of this new site must first get the support from the local residents. This is how good the system in UK but the weakness is that it will take longer to get approved. So, we had this meeting with the residents of Romsey today.

The residential area is occupied mostly by non-muslims. Building a mosque for some is like building a muslim area or maybe terrorists centre sort of thing for those non-muslims who have been poisoned by the irresponsible media. It was expected to have questions from them about the 'threat' of building a mosque. After a clear presentation by Shaykh Abdal Hakim Murad chaired by the Chair of Romsey Action, the Q & A session started with the problem of traffic and parking. Mill Road is already a very congested street and with lots of parking problems. However, Shaykh Abdal Hakim managed to dissolve this by assuring that it will only happen once a week during Friday lunch time. Other than that, there will be no problem. Other problems like the garden and other facilities at the site were debated at the meeting but they are not real issue.

Then, there was this old man kept on bringing up the racist issue and got booed by the audience (they are mostly non-muslims), shouting 'Shame' when he said about the muslims are immigrants. Shaykh Abdal Hakim said that he is an indigenous of Cambridge. Later, more non-muslims gave their support for the project including the need of diversity, inter-faith and inclusive. Alhamdulillah, we gain the backing of many of the residents. There are only parking and congestion issue left to discuss. More information about the project is here. It would be great if you can help this project by giving donation as instructed on the page. Email me if you want the bank details for online transfer.

This is how supportive the non-muslims to the muslims in a non-muslim country. I wonder how will muslims give their support to charitable works of non-muslims in a muslim country?

ALLAHU'alam.

Wassalam.

The Lake District

Assalamualaikum warahmatullah wabarakatuh,

Last weekend was the only weekend that the mosque was on holidays! So, it was a perfect time to go for a trip. We went to the Lake District, to be specific, we stayed at Langdale near Ambleside, visited Windermere and Kendal. The accommodation was cheap and comfortable but the weather was horrible. I only get to climb a hill on the first day and the next day was raining the whole time from morning till night to the last day, even on our journey home. It was only when we drove near Manchester that the weather changed to sunny day, urgh! But anyway, we planned but ALLAH plans better than us. Probably this is the best that we can get. Alhamdulillah.

One thing I learn a lot in this trip is the speech of En Nazri, the Director of MSD (Malaysian Student Department). I always thought that those who hold high position in the government usually are corrupted people with 'cables' to climb the ladder without much in their brains. Astaghfirullah, I should have more good opinion on them. En Nazri appears to be a very intellectual person. He knows what is he saying and doing. He gave good advice and talked with all the correct facts and figures. I was really impressed at his speech that night. 

Through this trip, there are some people that I gain more respect for them and there are some that I completely, utterly, loss all of my respect to them to the point of disgust. It is so true a hadith by the Prophet Muhammad (saw). We will not know a person (the real side of the person) until we did 3 things with him/her. 1. Stay with him/her; 2. Travel with him/her; 3. Doing business (muamalah - any kind of interaction or transaction) with him/her. Through this trip, I obviously have done all these 3 with them. The thing that really disgusted me is the fact that a sound, healthy, knowledgeable, able adult muslim who has been reminded to make prayer on the journey did not want to do so but chose to delay it and miss it even until we had arrived home after maghrib then had a meal until after isha! I wanted to give good opinion and lots of excuse for the reason of not carrying out the basic duty of a muslim. I just can't scratch anything out of my brain anymore to give any excuse except to say that the person must have prayed somewhere along the journey that I wasn't presence. 

Now I have realised the verse in the Qur'an about ALLAH will not change the state of a nation until the nation changes their own state. There appears to be a lot of muslims who know that prayer is obligatory and there are a lot of facilities in Malaysia to accommodate this form of worship like mosque, prayer room, wudu area in toilets, adhan in public, etc. But many 'muslims' choose to ignore these. Those saying about even if a nation prayed 5 times a day and didn't work hard to build a nation will never be able to change the state of the nation - is a completely rubbish statement! This is a paradox! It doesn't make sense at all for a nation which observe the obligatory act of worship will not gain success because by being perseverance in keeping the daily prayers sincerely, the nation is perseverance in doing anything - from business to government - sincerely. It's like saying muslims are extremists when real muslims are those on the middle way (ummatan wasatan). Many so-called muslim countries, if there are half of the nation who know the compulsories choose not to please ALLAH by fulfilling the obligatory duty, how on earth that ALLAH will change their state?

All these while I thought that Malaysian muslims aren't that bad. If they don't wear proper attire that cover their awrah, they still at least pray 5 times a day. I was wrong. And that's why ALLAH has yet to lift the difficulties, ignorance and poor state of the country because this nation with 60% muslims who have been educated since young that prayers are obligatory upon sound, healthy, knowledgeable, able adults, many of them choose not to fulfill it, how will ALLAH change our state?

All these while I thought that why we still need to put up signboards saying - pray before you are prayed (means make your prayers before you die and get people to make a funeral prayer for you). Now I have realised how important that signboards are. And this is the last thing that the Prophet Muhammad (saw) said before he breathed his last - ummati ummati salati salati. 

As for other nations which have yet learned about Islam and come to Islam, they are still non-believers (they are not kafir because kafir means one who rejects after truth has come to him/her), there is no obligation upon them. So, keep the argument of that verse of Qur'an out of the realm of non-believers. 

ALLAHU'alam.

Wassalam.

Murray Edwards College

Assalamualaikum warahmatullah wabarakatuh,

Yesterday, I attended the New Hall garden party invited by the soon-to-be-retired President of New Hall, Anne Lonsdale. This was meant to be her retirement party too. We were all given by a surprise speech by her, not that she decided not to retire but New Hall has changed its name to Murray Edwards College. The rational and history behind this are all here. And yes, we have a new website too with new logo. When I try to search this new name, it's already on Wikipedia.

There were mixture of feelings among the students and staff. I think I am a very nostalgic person. Tears suddenly rolled down from my cheeks when I heard the speech. I couldn't take the change at that point and was thinking of raising more money in the future, beat this £30 million and rename the college into New Hall again. But that was a temporal feeling. Today, I think I'm happy with the change and think that it is a way forward for the college. Much of the things will remain the same anyway, it's just a name.

I remember having problem when the sisters' emailing list changed its name from skirt to entropy. I was also very upset by it but eventually came to realise myself. It's just the moment.

With such a long name, usually people will only remember part of it. Like Gonville & Caius College is known as Caius, Sidney-Sussex College is known as Sidney, Lucy Cavendish College is known as Lucy and Corpus Christi College is known as Corpus. I hope we will get a nice glamour name. Btw, what are we now? From New Hallers to...?

Wassalam.

English wedding

Assalamualaikum warahmatullah wabarakatuh,

Summer is full of wedding, alhamdulillah. Yet another great sister has fulfilled half of her deen last Sunday. She is half Turkish and half Welsh married to a Gujerati Indian, so the wedding for the female side was very English. Set in an old building (actually a conference centre built upon old building) with big nice garden during this summer time, it was perfect for the big day. She dressed in white dress with white laces and white hijab while the groom dressed in dark grey suit. They matched each other perfectly. This wedding was blessed by the presence of Shaykh Abdal Hakim Murad with speech, poem, dua and burdah. I like the poem made by the shaykh especially when he said that "A Mohsin who lost in the Sahara" (check out their names in the picture above). 

After the brief ceremony with speech by the bride's father, the shaykh and Qur'an recitation by the groom's best friend; we had a light refreshment followed by photography session. Some took the opportunity to wonder around the massive yet serene garden while the kids played on the grass. We had a Mediterranean dinner with the hosts and the wedding ended with a speech by the fathers, friends and the couples. They then headed off to a hotel in a decorated car. They are now in Spain for honeymoon before they come back for the walimah (groom's side).

Unfortunately, I won't be able to attend the walimah next Sunday cause I have to go to a trip organised by the CAMMP (Cambridge Malaysian Muslim Postgraduates). I pray that their marriage will last forever.

Next month, it's the turn of an Iraqi sister. So, stay tune for an Arab-styled wedding.

Wassalam.

FATIN

3 hours a day

Assalamualaikum warahmatullah wabarakatuh,

I remember when I was at UTM, someone kept on stressing that a normal human usually properly sleeps for only 3 hours a day. There would be 1 hour before that and another 1 hour after that which are not proper sleep and can be easily woken up.  So, the quality sleeping hours are only 3, THREE! And that's what I am doing at the moment and has been doing it since this week. From a non-coffee drinker to one shot a day. I hope that my body can sustain it because I don't really feel very sleepy for most of the time and feel really fresh after that 3-hour sleep. The problem is, I am immune to alarm clock, so I have to always trouble my friends to give me a wake up call. Terrible! Anyway, just an update after not blogging for quite a while.

If we examined the sleeping hour of the Prophet Muhammad (saw), he probably slept less than we do. Imagine that Night Prayer is compulsory for him (saw) and he hardly slept in the day except a few before dhuhr time, I bet he (saw) must have slept way less than his ummah. He (saw) recommended us to sleep half the night, pray a quarter of the night and sleep again for 1/6 of it. So, if we take isha at 9pm in Makkah, after witr and all, he (saw) say slept at 10pm and say fajr was 5am. So, half the night was 3.5 hours, that's the sleep of Rasulullah (saw) everyday? 

Now, let's see our sleep in summer time. Isha is not until 11pm and fajr comes in at 2.30am, ok. let's make it 3am. So, we have 4 hours of 'night'. Half of it is 2 hours, so I basically sleep more than enough! Ok, I'm normal, alhamdulillah.

Btw, please make dua for me.

ALLAHU'alam.

Wassalam.

From Kuching

Assalamualaikum warahmatullah wabarakatuh,

As my work has catching up the momentum after the break to Athens, I don't want to blog until I have finished at least 1 chapter but today my sister emailed me a whole lots of pictures from Malaysia. I'm thrill of course and wished I can join them. Alhamdulillah to know that they are fine, especially my grandma.

This is the sister who sent me the photos, she is 3 years younger than me, she graduated with First Class and now a teacher. That's my father (papa) on her left.

She and her husband - registered but not wedded yet (according to culture)

From left, my younger sister (5 years younger), final year in uni doing Pharmacy; my youngest sister, now doing STPM; papa; the sister who sent me the photos and my youngest brother

They went fishing

Fishing is papa's hobby, ever since I have memory. He went fishing like every weekend. I went with him sometime to catch crabs.

My grandma (popo) birthday party! She is 91, mashaALLAH. The far left is my uncle (papa's younger brother). The far right is my cousin with his son and wife. Next to his wife is my uncle's wife.

Wow, a big cake! Popo must be very happy, only that she cannot really talk and has really weak hearing. Her eye-sight is still fine, alhamdulillah

Popo ate the cake herself, didn't need any assistance!

Though she can't walk that my brother has to carry her up to the place where they had her birthday party

My brother (got his hair shaved!) has to go to this stupid National Service in that ugly uniform. The second right is my step mum

They went to visit relatives during Chinese New Year

Papa bought a new car after my youngest sister passed her driving test - we are poor (papa has lots of debts which I hope I can pay off after I have finished my study) but since my sister and my step mum both want to drive, papa has to please them both

That's my niece which I've never met before. She is my elder sister's second daughter

That's all. Oh ALLAH, guide them to the straight path.

Wassalam.

I'm back from Athens

Assalamualaikum warahmatullah wabarakatuh,

I'm back in gloomy Cambridge again. Why gloomy? Cause Athens was sooooooooo sunny that there's no where to hide from the sun and there's no reason too to hide from it after living in the rainy UK for a long while. Anyway alhamdulillah got back safely after a horrible journey back.

We were scheduled to take off from Athens at 9.30pm (Greece time, or 7.30pm UK time) but the flight was delayed to 9.45pm. So we waited at the boarding terminal until 9.45pm but still we were not called to board. It was not until 10.15pm that we got on the plane and took off around 10.30pm. By then, most of us became friends already. It's always in this kind of difficult situation that people on the same boat unite.

After 3 hours and 20 minutes (as the captain announced), we landed at Gatwick airport. By the time we got to the luggage claiming area, it was 12.10am (UK time)! I was worried that I will have to take a taxi to go to my friend's house in London to stay the night as there is no train or coach from Gatwick to Cambridge at that hour!

We waited for another half an hour before the conveyance belt started to move. Everyone was mourning about the delay of the flight and then the luggage. By the time I got to Gatwick train station, it was almost 1am. There was no more tube service after 1am. My only option is the night bus or taxi. I got on the last Gatwick Express train at 1.35am. So, I arrived at the Victoria station at 2.10am. I was thinking how much do I need to pay to get a taxi, I mean the registered black cab which is the only safe option for me alone in London at that hour. I talked to a train conductor about my worry if I didn't the night bus and have to take a taxi, he assured me that there must be a night bus still.

Alhamdulillah, when I got out of the station, while the officers were chasing everyone out and preparing to close the gate, I saw the N52 was just right in front of me. I got on with my Oyster Card (actually, it's my friend's who allowed me to stay at hers) and was half-slept throughout the whole journey while keeping alert to the announcement on the bus. It's amazing that now the buses in London have this announcement system like the tube. So I don't have to look out to decide when to push the bell.

While on the bus, there was a group of black teenage boys. I don't know if they are muslims or not but they seriously were damaging the image of muslims. They covered themselves with hats and hoodies, only their eyes were visible. They were shouting in the bus in some kind of Arabic dialect mixed with English. And cried that they will bomb the bus while playing beeping sound as if a bomb is going to explode. Laughing and shouting that they want to kill the passengers, like drunk people. Such a disgrace to the muslims. As I was the only hijabi on the bus, I pretended to be sleeping (I was half-slept anyway) and push the bell when I heard my destination was near, quickly get off the bus.

To my shock, these boys stopped the same place as me. I dare not look back but just keep on walking with my heavy bags. After a distance from the bus stop, I turned back and saw that they actually walked in different direction of me from the bus stop. Alhamdulillah, I got to my friend's house at 3am. She has been waiting for me since before midnight. Poor girl, may ALLAH reward her a lot. I prayed fajr and went straight to sleep until 11.00am.

After meeting a friend in the afternoon, I went back to Cambridge in the evening. Alhamdulillah, I'm home now but since I've slept this morning, I can't sleep now, even I've tried. So, I decided to write a post of the journey back home though I have not said anything about my journey to and at Athens. I hope I have the time to do so, if not, please remind me as I have taken more than 250 photos of the historical sites of Athens.

There are a lot of lessons to learn from my trip this time. Just the journey back, patience is the main lesson to draw from it. Such calamity is also a chance to know people more and honestly I nearly cried during this journey back, not because of the difficulty but because of some little things that people did that really touched me.

The fact that even if my friend had forgotten about my arrival and would stay a night at hers, she still tried her best to ensure that I have the access to her room by the help of her housemates. The fact that, in such a situation, there is still someone out there praying and worrying for me, even until 3am. I felt really bad for keeping her waiting for me. The fact that there is a sister who is ready to come down to Victoria station to pick me up in case I missed the bus. One lady from among the passengers who also travelled by train bid farewell with me and asked me to take care of myself really touched me. She sounded really worried about me and we don't even know each other's names. Before the bus moved, the train conductor came near the bus window where I sat and gave me a smile and thumb-up, relieved that I got on the bus that I wanted.

There are so many people that I want to thank but I couldn't. May ALLAH reward them abundantly. There are so much that I want to say about this trip but for I have to go back to work now. Have to write another paper for another conference in Paris in July, inshaALLAH.

Wassalam.

Travelling

Assalamualaikum warahmatullah wabarakatuh,

I like travelling, seeing new places and meeting people, learning knowledge that I will never ever have the chance to learn except by experiencing it myself. Probably that is the only reason that I like about travelling, other than that I don't really like travelling.

First, I always get travel sick, especially on a stuffy bus. Worse, if it is a bus that stops ever so often or travelling on journey that requires constant braking, like lots of traffic lights, curvy path, etc. That's why I always prefer train though it's a bit more expensive but at least I can rest properly on the journey or have the pleasure to enjoy the scenery.

Second, to arrange the transportation and accommodation. It is easy and fun if I have the budget to do it. But when it is a low-cost trip, everything has to be done only after extensive research to find the cheapest and the best, and worst of all to book or buy in advance so that a low price is secured. This is the one thing that takes away my excitement to travel. If I am not sure if I want to go at that time, if I need that accommodation, if I have better choice to stay at a friend's rather than B & B, if... it is very difficult to decide the booking & purchasing. I hate the refund policy. It is like a kind of punishment to potential customers, especially the poor customer like me.

This issue comes into my post today though I am in a midst of stress completing my thesis and not sleeping the whole night because I am sorting out a few trips. I want to let you know that I am off to Athens this Sunday until Thursday for a conference. Fortunately this one is partially sponsored, so it's not a big stress to make the arrangement.

I am also organising the accommodation for a trip to the Lake District in June. It was such a hassle and I have been speaking to quite a few number of caravan parks to check the availability and to get the cheapest rate. Alhamdulillah, it was sorted after 1 month but now we are going to think about actually preparing food there, activities and transportation. I'm glad that I am not the person in-charged of these, only helping.

Next, in July, I am going to another conference in Paris. This time, I have not secured any funding from anyone cause I have exceeded the limit of funding that my faculty has ruled out for each PhD student. Also, I am not sure if my college will be happy to give me any more funding cause I have just been granted one last term to Athens, but I applied anyway, who knows, if ALLAH willed. So, this trip is a bit more head-ached than the Athens. Eurostar is so expensive inthe weekend and cheap ticket in the weekdays is only available in crazy hours like before 7am or after 7pm from London, not Cambridge, mind you. I have no funding to go to this conference in Paris, so to book a B & B is too much for me. There's no way that I can save on transportation but there is way to save on accommodation. Though I am tempted to stay at a friend's friend's friend's house to save money but since I have never met the sister and already I am going to stay at hers for FREE, I take this as very rude though I know that the sister won't mind the trouble but still I am very reluctant to be the reason for people to feel uncomfortable or unhappy, if I misbehaved while in their hospitality.

After speaking to my supervisor, he is happy that I should submit my thesis in August. So I am not going to do anymore travelling like this until September where there will be another conferece in Edinburgh. This time, the organiser is going to give grant for a few selected students. I pray that I will get it. If so, I will not have to worry much about money factor. Moreover, the accommodation of this conference is arranged by the organiser, so I don't suffer the head-ache in arranging this trip.

See, I like travelling if I can be sure that I will have a pleasant journey to and back, as well as MONEY to make my bookings. Many ask me if I am excited going to Athens this Sunday. My answer is no because I am loaded with the pressure to complete chapter 4 of my thesis and all these troubles to arrange the logistic of my trips in low budget that I completely lost the 'appetite' of travelling. Anyway, I pray that everything will go well, that I won't get lost in Athens when I can't even understand a word of Greek! Also, my presentation will go well and paper will be accepted for publication. And finally, I will at least enjoy the trip.

ALLAHU'alam.

Wassalam.

Disgusting

Assalamualaikum warahmatullah wabarakatuh,

Yesterday, from my room's window, I saw a couple kissing outside a shop right opposite my room. I thought it is just a normal lovely couple at the first glance. Then I gave a second glance cause I felt that they don't look like a boy and a girl, instead 2 girls. My feeling was right when I took a second look at them. I don't usually do this, believe it or not, first glance is excusable. They are two teenage girls, probably in their Year 9/10 secondary school. Both have pony tail, that's what made me gave a second look.

This happened on Mill Road at afternoon time. There were a lot of people walking up and down the street. I think most of them feel disgusted like me when they saw this couple kissing publicly. There was a group of teenage boys walked pass. They were like staring at the couple for a long while. I don't know if the couple took the opportunity to do more or just ignored those boys, but it made them stayed longer in that position. I feel even disgusted now to write this but I think it is a great lesson for us to learn.

I am not a homophobic. I don't go and kill homosexuals but I do condemn homosexuality. It is certainly against my religion and I can say it is against humanity no matter how people want to argue that it is basic human right.

First, against religions. There has been lesson that ALLAH gave to the People of Lut for their transgression in homosexuality. The God has created humans in two different sexes for reasons. If man-man and woman-woman can procreate, why bother create man-woman for procreation? If marriage is just to share love, it is enough to share love with your family, but if marriage is for procreation, then find a partner that can physically do so!

Second, against humanity. If everyone chooses same sex partner, there will be no next generation. Let's say human extincts! I suppose people can just go to labs to have kids but how many percent of success? How to teach your children that this is your father and that is your father too. It's against the nature because even animals which do not have a high cognitive level do know that they need opposite sex partners, what about us humans who can think and act rationally when we want to act rationally.

People will say that it is the sign of the Last Day. I suppose they are right about it but we don't give in to it instead we should keep on educate people to the right path. No, I am teaching them to be homophobia but I want them to understand that it is not the purpose of ALLAH to make man-man or woman-woman in this kind of relationship, not for marriage, definitely.

Anyway, this is just my thought. You have your right to think what is good and please do not forget that I have my right too to think what is good and morale. If you don't understand what I am saying, read Surah al-Kafirun and apply it to daily life, human right and paradigm, not just to religions.

ALLAHU'alam.

Wassalam.

Materialism vs. Spirituality

Assalamualaikum warahmatullah wabarakatuh,

I went to the last ISOC circle for this term before May Week. ISOC invited a UK well known islamic scholar who is also one of the teachers in Sunnipath that answers fiqh questions - Mufti Muhammad ibn Adam al-Kawthari. The talk as the title of this post was specially picked by himself as a reminder for us. Between the extreme of materialism and spirituality, he advised us to take the middle-path as many sound scholars will tell us to do so.

One point that I really like about his talk is that when we said about different madhhab and groups of muslims, can we really say that others are wrong and we are right, others are munafiq and kafir? He said, ultimately, all the muslims, in any group, strive to please ALLAH and believe that their way is the best way to reach the destination. No matter how a person stands and pray (salah), it is not important, the important thing is that the person prays 5 times a day. Rather than criticising those who pray differently from us (different ways of putting the hands, saying 'bismillah' or not in Fatihah, etc.), it is better for us to concentrate our effort on those who don't pray.

Come back to the theme of the talk. He gave 3 really good examples of how we see the dunya and the akhirah. He used water, a car and a toilet to describe the dunya.

1. Water
To reach our destination (to ALLAH), where a boat is the only means, we must travel by water. The boat is the heart while the water is the dunya and our destination is ALLAH and akhirah. To get there safely, we must go through the water and make sure that the water that enter the boat doesn't exceed the limit hence sunk the boat. We can possess worldly stuff but do not let the heart loves them, even if we love some of them, do not let them take over our hearts. Like it or not, we must get across the dunya to reach akhirah, so row safely by not letting the water fills the boat until it sinks.

2. A car
Nowadays car is a common means of transport. To reach a destination, we drive. When we are driving, our focus is on the road that will bring us to the destination. While driving, we may also do other stuff like thinking, talking, eating, listening, etc. In this world, we are constantly driving, non-stop to reach the akhirah. We focus on akhirah but at the same time we are allowed to do other worldly stuff if we wished but make sure that we don't loose the focus. If we loose our focus, we will perish in a car accident.

3. A toilet
He said this is an extreme example. A toilet is a must in a house, like it or not. If we see the toilet as the dunya, we know that it is necessary to go into it at least once a day - only when we need it. We don't obsess with the toilet, we don't think about it all day long, our hearts are not attached to it. Yes, that's should be our attitude towards the dunya. It is necessary to reach akhirah but we don't feel attach to it cause that is not our final aim.

Having said all about these, of course there is no way that a muslim should seclude him/herself into the jungle, wearing the same 2 pieces of cloth and meditating all day long. It is also not right to be materialistic that only wealth is the most important thing in life thus making wealth/money an idol that a muslim worships. Always, always come back to the middle way because clearly ALLAH said in the Qur'an that the muslims are the middle-way nation.

Hope you benefit from his talk too. May ALLAH help us to reach our destination to HIM safely.

ALLAHU'alam.

Wassalam.

Floppy A diskette

Assalamualaikum warahmatullah wabarakatuh,

Today I was looking all over the faculty to get a floppy A diskette - a type of computer information storage that is nearly extinct. I needed it to make a boot disc to install Windows operating system in my new Mac so that I can have 2 platforms in 1 laptop. Alhamdulillah, the operation was a success after so many trials since I bought this new laptop about a month ago.

It is so amazing how technology moves so fast that things become out-of-date, either quickly or gradually. I remember that diskette is the easiest means for us to store information from computer when I was at university (nearly 10 years ago). We used to use WinZip all the times to store a file that is more than 1.44MB - seriously 1.44MB! How did we survive at that time? And before diskette, we have that type thin black plastic floppy which measures 8 inches and stores 1.2MB, joke!

Later, when I discovered CD-R which can store 700MB (depends on the CD-R), I bought a CD-writer and assembled it to my PC, that was way before many used CD-R. I was thrill at that discovery and that breakthrough really helped my study a lot when we have to do multimedia programmes as assignments. When CD-R and CD-RW was no more something uncommon, I bought a laptop which can burn DVDs - that gives me at least 4.0GB of storage (again, depends of the DVD-R)! Another breakthrough. Now, we have blu-ray and God knows what's next. Today, none of my laptops have even a floppy drive to read a floppy disc. The new Mac Air Book doesn't even have a CD/DVD-ROM yet can read CD/DVD remotely from another computer/laptop!

Of course, we have stuff like external USB-based storage, i.e., memory stick/pen drive, Zipdrive and also memory cards (many types of them) and now SDHC that can store up to 12GB in one small memory card. Conventional hard disc drive (HD-RAM) spins, that's why we need to defrag it once in a while. Now there is this new Solid State Drive where there is no more spinning hard drive but a file is located in the hard drive directly!

Looking back into today's incident to find a diskette to make a boot disc, it really reminds me of how fast time flies and how easily we can get behind if we don't catch up. I'm not just talking about technology but knowledge. If we don't learn today, there will be more stuff to learn tomorrow and we will never be able to catch up unless we have that ability to pick up things fast and have good teacher that can give us a crash course from scratch.

ALLAHU'alam.

Wassalam.

Generosity needs courage

Assalamualaikum warahmatullah wabarakatuh,

This is a really refreshing talk to listen and reflect on:



If you have the 21 minutes, do try to listen to it.

Wassalam.

Miscarriage

Assalamualaikum warahmatullah wabarakatuh,

No, not me, it's my friend, another long-lost friend which I have the chance to be reunited by ALLAH from an internet social network that has many negative publicities - facebook. Ok, that's not the point, the point is I feel sad for what has happened to my friend. Frankly, we have not met for more than 10 years. She was my secondary school classmates and recently we got in-touch with each other again, in a very miraculous way but obviously it's pre-planned by ALLAH, the All Mighty.

She is a Christian who follows local church and she has just married recently, which again I missed, argh! I am very happy for her because from how she described, he seems like a Mr. Nice Guy, pious Christian, professional medical doctor, vegetarian, mature and stable. When I got reunited with her a few weeks ago, I phoned her and we had a long chat (using phone card to call Malaysia isn't that expensive, less than 2p per min). She is of course shocked at my choice of faith and thought that I did so for a random muslim boyfriend, which I never had one. The attempt to get back the 10-year that we have missed obviously is not going to be done in a long chat. However, from the conversation I can feel how much I have missed her and she is very interested about my life.

Today, I received an email from her telling me the bad news. I don't know why me. We have not met for 10 years, we were not the best friends at school, we have different faith, I never have the experience of pregnancy or miscarriage, I am in UK and she is back in Malaysia, what can I do from here? Of course dua and words of support. I can only tell her to take care of herself and have faith in The God's plan.

In my heart, I really want to invite everyone to my faith but if this is not likely to happen, I wish that everyone can at least believe in God, believe in the Day of Judgement and do good deeds. As ALLAH said in the Qur'an that:

Those who believe (in the Qur'an), and those who follow the Jewish (scriptures), and the Christians and the Sabians,- any who believe in ALLAH and the Last Day, and work righteousness, shall have their reward with their Lord; on them shall be no fear, nor shall they grieve.

~ The Holy Qur'an, Surah al-Baqarah (Chapter 2, The Cow) verse 62

Of course I don't know the real interpretation of this verse but if this is the minimum requirement from ALLAH to all the humans, even others choose not to be muslims, at least they should have faith and do good deeds because this makes a human humane. Many times Shaykh Hamza Yusuf talked about before become a muslim, be a human first. A muslim is humane.

Having faith in ALLAH's words, I have been trying to talk about God with many other Christian friends. This is not the first case but I sure hope that she also has the same understanding of The God's will and Master Plan. This miscarriage happens for good reasons that we will never be able to understand until later, if we reflect on it. That's why again, ALLAH said that HE will guide those who reflect or basically use the brain to think!

I remember once talking to a Christian (who only goes to church once a year type of Catholic). She is my coursemate from Kenya. After the recent election, there was a sort of civil war among the tribes people in Kenya. She was very worried and sad about this whole thing especially when her families are all in Kenya and are the tribe same as the elected President. She couldn't go home because she needs to finish her PhD and she cannot do anything even if she went home and obviously not here too. I just keep on telling her to have faith, do good deeds and pray for their safety. She seems like suddenly woke up from a long sleep and forgot that all this while she has this very powerful weapon - prayer. Now, she is calmer and happier, alhamdulillah.

Of course, I wish that my friends can see and accept the beauty of Islam. I pray that ALLAH will guide them all and make me a good preacher which follows the footstep of the Prophet Muhammad (saw) in his way of preaching Islam to others.

ALLAHU'alam.

Wassalam.

A Pakistani wedding

Assalamualaikum warahmatullah wabarakatuh,

This is the first time I attended a Pakistani wedding and have the opportunity to witness almost everything because I was with the bride all the time on that day. I don't know how this happened. Basically, I should be at home doing my work but this Rihla sister who I only met during Rihla and become so close yet hardly see each other after the Rihla begged me to attend her wedding. There are a few reasons. Firstly, she has been talking to me regarding the marriage proposal process since a few months ago and probably she found support from me (I don't really give any advice, maybe cause I got some spare free minutes to give her an ear to listen to her dilemma). Secondly, she needs a photographer (of course I'm not a good one, just cause I have a nice second-hand D-SLR, it takes better pictures than conventional digital cameras) and she doesn't want any of her friends and relatives to take and keep any of her pictures. Not that she doesn't trust any one of them, but if she let one take pictures, the rest will want to. So she banned camera at her wedding. Also, it's because her husband's family made the same request. You see, her husband family is 'hard-core' muslims which another Rihla sister said, it's the next level!

Ok, enough of reasons why I went all the way to Birmingham last saturday at 5.51am to attend the wedding and came back at the evening, the same day. I even took a day off the mosque which I usually won't do. This sister is very precious to me, I don't know how to explain it but I know that she is mashaALLAH a very pious sister who puts ALLAH and Prophet Muhammad (saw) above anything, even herself. Probably the love to ALLAH and HIS Messenger (saw) is the only reason that brings us together.

I don't know anyone there and I went there alone. She made me feel very comfortable with all the strangers around by making sure that I am always next to her. When I arrived at her house, a beautician was doing make-up for her (she is a very simple sister and this is the first time she has this much make-up on her) and she let no one into her room except me, and her sisters who came in once in a while to take stuff cause that's their room. She has lots of cousins, I mean a lot, countless because many of her family members marry among cousins. I remember while sitting at the long table eating, I was surrounded by her cousins. And whenever I introduced myself and then asked them who they are, they said they are her cousins, cousins, and cousins, and occasionally aunties who happen to be the cousins of her parents! This is part of Pakistani culture, not that they like to marry to close relatives but you can only give your daughters out to a family that you trust and know well. For my friend to marry someone out of her own tribe, it took a long process and that's why she always talked to me whenever thing went wrong before both their parents agreed upon this marriage.

I took some pictures of her and when the groom arrived, we peeked from the window and she asked me to take some pictures of the men waiting out there. Just to let you know that her family and her husband's family are very islamic, but this does not apply to all their relatives. She lives on a street where most of her relatives live. So her next door is her uncle's house. What they did is that they made her house into a sisters house and next door a brothers house. All the ladies including guests and kids who stick to their mums sat in her house while the men next door. So, when the groom arrived, the men greeted him and brought all the male guests to next door while the ladies into her house. This is the same at the reception hall. Proper segregation.

Next, her father, uncle and other 2 witnesses came up to her room to ask for her consent to get married. Later, all the men went to a mosque to make the akad nikah while she phoned her brother at the mosque to get a live telecast of the declaration and khutbah. And she is officially married! Then, we covered her in jilbab and duppata to get into her father's car and headed to the reception hall. She sat in the ladies section with all her beautiful lengga and jewelry while friends and relatives came to greet her. I have no idea what happened in the men section but in the ladies section, we have more than 600 guests. How do I know? Well, there were 5 long tables that can sit in 24 people each. When guests come, whoever got the seat will be served with starters, then main courses, then dessert. When the dessert came, those who sat around the hall will stand near the tables and waited for empty chairs while the tables were being cleaned. This process happened 5 times.

When it's time to close the hall (the reception was 12 noon to 4pm), we covered the bride again and got on the car and headed home. Then it's what the Pakistani call the Rukhsati. This is when the bride bids farewell to the family and sends off with the husband's family. She has already packed all her stuff and she wore her hijab properly, covered with her big jilbab and another white cloth over her face so that the men won't be able to see her beautiful face with all the make-ups and jewelry. We loaded her husband's car with her 3 suitcases while she went down to meet all her families and friends. This is the saddest moment and everyone cried. At this moment, I stopped following her because there were too many people surrounding her. I only have the chance to bid farewell to her when she was already in the car.

This is Pakistani culture cause if you can imagine in the old days in Pakistan, when it is difficult to travel and lodge, the husband family can only come for the wedding and bring the bride home. There's no place for big families to stay and the journey is difficult to make. So, the easiest way is to bring the bride home with all her belongings as soon as the wedding is over. This is the first time I witnessed such a wedding and honestly, I didn't get the chance to even meet the husband because of the segregation and how strict they are to keep everything as halal as possible. The next day will be the walimah for the husband's side but I won't go cause this is enough for me and I have class at the mosque the next day.

Now that she is married and gone to live with her in-laws, I hope she will be able to adjust herself with the new environment. I can't imagine this happens to me because you basically hardly know your in-laws yet on the day after your wedding, you pack all your stuff and move to this 'strangers' house and start your new life there! I pray that everything will be good for her and may ALLAH bestow her and her family with happiness and blessing, and may ALLAH keep this relationship until they go to the Paradise together with lots of their offspring. Amin.

Wassalam.

Can't believe it has been 10 years!

Assalamualaikum warahmatullah wabarakatuh,

Today, my long lost friend came all the way from london to visit me. We went to the same secondary school but she left to New Zealand to get a PR there so that she can have a better chance for higher education there in the future without having to pay international student fee, since Malaysia cannot guarantee enough and fair places for non-bumiputra in local university. Since then, we only get to meet no more than 2 times and the last time was 10 years ago. We were best friends at school and her departure to NZ is quite bitter for me but that's for her own good.

Yet, ALLAH is Ar-Rahman and Al-Latif, today we finally met. She still looks ever stunning like she used to be, only that she used to be far taller than me but now we are only 5 inches difference. She has married and moved to London from NZ. Her husband is from Kuching and a PhD holder in Fire Engineering. I am so happy for her because he gives her a lot of freedom. We went to have a cup of tea to catch up each other's history, 10 year of history. Since today, the sun was so generous that the temperature for the first time this year shot up over 20C, we sat on grass and continued the history and talked about life in general. We went to my room and continued the conversation and this time about my conversion to Islam. I am so glad that she can accept me and most of the teaching of Islam. Her husband is a practicing Roman Catholic and she is a Buddhist. She is very aware of the similarity between Christianity and Islam. We chatted for a long time regarding Islamic teaching and cultural practice that blurs out the beauty of Islam. She totally agrees with it and I pray that ALLAH will give guidance for her and her husband to accept Islam as a way of life.

I wish to meet more of my high school friends in the future.

ALLAHU'alam.

Wassalam.

Lion Dance

Assalamualaikum warahmatullah wabarakatuh,

I was in my room when I heard this very familiar drumming, a rhythm I was so used to since I've grown up in a street with 3 Chinese temples and which held at least 3 major Chinese goddesses colourful processions annually. I quickly opened the curtain and saw a read lion dancing in front of the new Chinese restaurant just across the street. This is the first time I saw Lion Dance in UK. It is a very busy street and the dance is so small scale that it was performed by 2 Chinese ladies and a young man was playing the drum on the narrow pedestrian path at the restaurant's entrance. A crowd of people surrounded the area to watch the performance which for seems to amuse them but for the Chinese, this is how you earn blessing, prosperity, fortune and luck by playing Lion Dance at an opening of a new business. Later, when I walked pass the restaurant to the mosque for maghrib prayer, I saw the restaurant was filled with English customers, probably to get the best offer of the opening day. This is how people appreciate each other's difference rather than fight over it.

Here in the UK, it is a very, very multi-ethnic society, especially in big cities like, London, Birmingham, Manchester, Liverpool and Glasgow. There has been a saying here that 'in every 4 people you met, there will be at least 1 Chinese'. As I'm a Chinese, I do not wish to say that Chinese is better but this is just to imply that Chinese is everywhere in the world. It is always easy to spot a China Town in any big city in the world. However, the point of this post is to say that multi-ethnicity in UK has never failed to attract the UK "non-bumiputra" to follow and practice the UK "bumiputra" culture yet still manage to maintain and practice theirs. Among the English culture (I am not talking about modern western culture) here are: wearing tie and suit to work; tea and biscuit culture; greeting random people on the street especially in the morning; giving way by a man to a woman when walking on a narrow path; man opens door for woman even the woman is behind him; if you open a self-closed door and notice someone is behind you, you hold the door and wait for that person to come; burping is very rude; give blessing to someone who sneezes; go to pub in the evening after work; have wine reception in every formal event; have lunch on the grass if the sun is out; etc. Some are good and some are bad but the "non-bumiputra" or the "non-English" who immigrated or grew up here did not stop following the "bumiputra" culture though the "bumiputra" has never imposed this to them. Many non-muslims non-bumiputra go to pub after work to socialise with friends and colleagues, many non-bumiputra respect women in the public (not sure at home), many non-bumiputra (even are not Christians) say 'bless you' when someone sneezes. I have seen in an occasion, a practicing Pakistani muslim brother wore a Scottish kilt during a winter fair (of course the socks are very thick and cover his awrah completely). He owns a halal grocery and he always wears tie and shirt at work yet when he goes to religious and cultural function, he wears shawar (Pakistani man attire), he speaks Urdu and follow some Pakistani culture that does not contradict with Islamic teaching.

Reflecting the situation here and the situation in Malaysia, it is as though the non-bumiputra in Malaysia must embrace the culture of bumiputra even if there are some which are not attractive for them to follow. It is as though the non-bumiputra do not want to learn the bumiputra culture. It is as though the government is not happy with the non-bumiputra who openly say that they want to retain their culture. It is as though if you refuse to embrace the bumiputra culture, you are not the citizen of Malaysia.

Going back to the Lion Dance, it was loud on the street but no one complained yet they appreciated it. No one boycotted the restaurant yet they filled it in. When we have mosque open day, the majority of the participants are English who open-mindedly visited us and wanted to learn more of other's culture. When English friends invited me over for tea and biscuit, I happily accepted their invitation. I really cannot understand why the paradigm and mind-set among some Malaysians are so intolerant, either for the non-bumiputra to accept the good culture of the bumiputra or for the bumiputra to accept what other non-bumiputra's culture as long as it doesn't harm the public.

Probably the major difference between the UK bumiputra and Malaysian bumiputra is that the former has done good publicity in making their culture appears to be more attractive to others. Keris and head-hunting aren't that attractive, I supposed. As many have proposed in Malaysia, can we just look beyond the race and culture as ALLAH has created all of us equal and it has also been constituted in the UN. Racism is not just against ALLAH's law but many countries' law. In addition, bumi or earth doesn't belong to anyone in particular, none of the thing in the world belongs to anyone anyway because they are all belong to ALLAH. Once you possessed enough that you need to survive, the excess should be shared among the poor and the needy, that's why we need to pay zakah.

And btw, the word 'ALLAH' is used in the Arabic and Indonesian bibles.

ALLAHU'alam.

Wassalam.

Teachers in UK on strike

Assalamualaikum warahmatullah wabarakatuh,

Today, about 8000 schools in UK have no teachers to teach due to a strike over their salary, except those who still continue to give education to the innocent students who do not decide how much the teachers will be paid. Some students may well be happy when classes are cancelled. However, for those who truly want an education, they will be the group that will suffer the worst in this strike. Teachers' salary isn't that bad for a degree holder. Of course, with the salary one cannot enjoy a luxurious life style, yet it is enough to sustain in the UK.

As oil price and food price are rising drastically recently, will the teachers in Malaysia also go for a strike?

Wassalam.

A heart

Assalamualaikum warahmatullah wabarakatuh,

The Prophet Muhammad (saw) said that: "Surely there is in the body a small piece of flesh; if it is good, the whole body is good, and if it is corrupted, the whole body is corrupted, and that is surely the heart."

~ Imam Bukhari

A good heart is like a good fire alarm. A very high quality fire alarm can detect smoke and heat before a fire starts. A better one can even connect straight to some devices to put off the fire or alert the fire station. However, it doesn't mean that a fire alarm once is installed will be working like it intended to be. You need to make sure that it is put in a correct way, test it consistently, maintain it, clean the sensor after a while, put in the right place, don't dirty it, damage it, cover it, etc. It's not easy but the reward is very high. You save yourself, your property and your family & friends from fire if you have a good fire alarm. With a good fire alarm doesn't mean that you cannot cook in your house or lit a scent stick. A really good one will be programmed in a way that certain amount of smoke and heat should not be a case of fire. This needs hard work and good engineering (education).

The heart is the central of a human soul. Without it, a human has no soul. Dirty heart makes a person acts inhumanely, or worse to say, like an animal. Human can be achieve a rank higher than the angel and also a rank lower than the animal. Pure and clean heart is a measure to tell us what is right and wrong. It is sometime the instinct some people called when you think it is the right or wrong thing to do. A clean heart can easily weight out the wrong path. Many scholars believe that a clean heart is the central of learning because knowledge will only reside in a clean heart. That's why when we say we memorise something, we say we learn something by-heart. Imam Shafi'i said that

“I complained to Wakee` (his teacher) about my bad memory, and he taught me that I should keep away from sin. He said that knowledge of ALLAH is light, and the light of ALLAH is not given to the sinner (whose heart is filthy).”

How to maintain and take care of the heart? These are a few tips:

1. Avoid unnecessary talk or speech that will hurt others.

On the authority of Anas, the Prophet (saw) said: "The faith of a servant is not put right until his heart is put right, and his heart is not put right until his tongue is put right."

~ Al-Musnad

On the authority of Ibn Umar: "Do not talk excessively without remembering Allah, because such excessive talk without the mention of Allah causes the heart to harden, and the person furthest from Allah is a person with a hard heart."

~At-Tirmidhi

2. Avoid unrestrained glance.

It has been related that the Prophet (saw) once said words to the effect: "The glance is a poisoned arrow of shaytan. Whoever lowers his gaze for ALLAH, HE will bestow upon him a refreshing sweetness which he will find in his heart on the day that he meets HIM."

~ At-Tabarani

3. Avoid sinning and haram food. What we eat will certainly be part of our flesh and of course a heart is our flesh. If we eat halal and healthy food it can strengthen our memories. So, if we eat filthy and haram food, we are making the heart ill and lost its ability to make good judgement.

The food of the heart is remembrance of ALLAH. So, take care of that small piece of flesh in our body.

ALLAHU'alam.

Wassalam.

ex-Highian

Assalamualaikum warahmatullah wabarakatuh,

I am an ex-Highian. What does that mean? I was a student of SMK (or back then SMB) Kuching High, or in English - Kuching High School, class of 98. After leaving the school for uni and start my career and then continue my study, I have since then lost contact with many of my friends there. Kuching High is a venue for me to learn and grow up. Those buddies at the schools are like my siblings. We grow up together, from Transition year to Form 5 - good six years of my early adolescence were spent in one of the most prestigious secondary schools at my home town. It is at least the most prestigious one for non-bumiputra because there is no way that a school like mine will have endless resources and funding from the government to those boarding schools in the country yet we still stand out among the rest of the students in my state where one of my friends was awarded the best student of whole Sarawak in 1998. We are called 'Bantuan' because we are not subsidised by the government, only a few percent of the budget is supported by the government. The rest is from school fees and sponsorships. We are lucky that this secondary school is funded by the Sarawakian Teochew Association. It is not a racist school as there are several Indians, Malays and Ibans in the school though 90% of the students are chinese from all dialect groups. It is open to everyone but due to the dominant Chinese population in this area and inside the school inself, the Chinese is still the majority.

This school promises a sense of Chinese-ness and cultures but at the same time offers the same national curriculum and not demanding tuition fees as expensive as the private Chinese schools which follows the Chinese curriculum. This school also gives me the opportunity to learn, not just learning in the classroom and extra-curriculum but more than that. We have the freedom to do a lot of things in the school, based on our creativity and courage. Clubs and societies are mainly managed by students, the teachers only sit there watching. We designed T-shirts, printed, sold; we wrote letters to companies, organised trips, booked buses; we published magazine, talked to shops managers for sponsorships, distributed it; we decided the programme we wanted for a camping trip, where, how, budget, etc. We didn't trouble teacher for a lot of things. That's what makes the sense of belongingness at the school. That's what makes us tied to each other so close. Because we basically build the school together with the teachers and the management side. We always took the task to raise money for the school because the government did not give us enough as what they give to other malay-populated schools and boarding schools.

That makes us such a strong bunch. Beside championing the league table of the state, we also have lots of students who achieved exceptional performance in academic and non-academic, national and international competitions. It proves to be right when I just being re-connected with my long-lost friends!

Surprisingly, two days ago, I received an email from a friend (she is very dear to me but then moved to New Zealand) from my other facebook account which I named it using my Chinese name. Through her, I found the rest of my ex-Highians. When I thought that they must have forgotten me since we have not communicated for nearly 10 years, they actually have been trying to look for me, especially when they were getting married. Ah! I missed their weddings. Some tried to phone my old Malaysian mobile number. I honestly cannot believe what is happening now. I felt like finding back my long-lost family.

Throughout my years in UK, actually some of them have been here too! We missed each other. We are so close yet so far, I just can't believe this. Alhamdulillah, I still manage to find one who I will meet this Saturday, inshaALLAH. She live in London and I was there last Saturday. The tube station where I got off to meet my friends when I visited London was just 2 stations away from her! Qadrullah, truly I submit to ALLAH's will and destiny. How much this has proved the will and power of ALLAH. I just talked to an ex-Highian and that she will being moving to Taiwan soon after her wedding. That is for good and we don't know if we can meet each other again.

My life on this world isn't that long but enough to let me open and close different chapters of my life. I thought the secondary school chapter is close but suddenly, it is open again. I thank ALLAH for this and thank HIM more that my friends still can accept me even I am not the same name and same faith again. Alhamdulillah.

Wassalam.

School song:

We are students of Kuching High;
We are builders of Malaysia;
Glory to our Kuching High;
Glory to our country.

Be sound in knowledge, be kind in nature;
We are students of the school;
Be healthy in mind, be healthy in body;
We are citizens of Malaysia.

Glory to our Kuching High;
Glory to our country.

Al-Fatihah...

Assalamualaikum warahmatullah wabarakatuh,

Every soul shall taste of death, and you shall only be paid fully your reward on the resurrection day; then whoever is removed far away from the fire and is made to enter the garden he indeed has attained the object; and the life of this world is nothing but a provision of vanities.

~ The Holy Qur'an, Surah Ali Imran (Chapter 3, Family of Imran) verse 185

This is what ALLAH has promised and today after the Friday prayer, a jenazah prayer was performend at 3.30pm at the mosque for this Syrian brother who is also the manager of a halal grocery just opposite my house - Spice Gate. It was announced at the jumaah that it will be prayed at 2.45pm but postponed to 3.30pm. May ALLAH have mercy on him, forgive all his sins and place him with the righteous people in the Paradise.

I have never seen in my real life how hard strong young men wept and cried over a death. Today I witnessed it and from no feeling of grief, I can hardly hold my tears. Most of the ladies have already been crying for quite a while when watching the body being put into a private ambulance to be sent off for burial. The crowd of brothers surrounding the ambulance at the mosque entrance have red eyes and watery eye-lids. They were hugging and comforting each other. There was a young brother in his early 20s standing alone quite far from the ambulance (about 2 houses away from the mosque entrance), his eyes were looking at the ambulance while tears dropping and he has to use his palm to cover his mouth from shouting.

Such a scene proved that the disease is such a respectable and much loved man. Moreover, the fact that many people were still at the mosque waiting to pray that jenazah prayer even though it was postponed, shows how much people like to bid farewell to him. Some even said that it is a sign of a righteous person if he or she passed away on Friday.

Today, at the khutbah, the khatib reminded us that charity should be done as soon as possible because we won't know if we will live another day to consume the money that we have saved or to give it out for another charity.

May we all die in Islam and given the privilege to reside in ALLAH's Paradise. Amin.

Ya Dhaljalali wal ikram, amitna ala dinnil islam.

ALLAHU'alam.

Wassalam.

CamERA 2008

Assalamualaikum warahmatullah wabarakatuh,

We have a full-day conference today at the faculty. It's called CamERA 2008 though I am not sure what does ERA means, probably Educational Research Annual (or Association but unlikely). Anyway, it is a great opportunity every year to come to this conference and meet almost all the academic staff and phd students in the faculty.

Since early this year, the faculty has divided all the academic staff and research students into five different groups according to the areas of interest. I am under the Science, Technology & Mathematics Education group and my supervisor organises our own little Science Learning group which initially has nothing to do with this umbrella group cause we have been running our group long before the introduction of these five groups. I am also a member of another research group named Self-regulated Learning under the Psychology & Neuroscience in Education group led by Dr. David Whitebread. Reseach groups are very important not just as a form of support and motivation for phd students who are working independently (or alone) most of the time but also a place to learn and update ourselves with latest news and development in the respective research area. You will never know what you can learn from attending the meetings.

Today, at the conference, the parallel sessions were divided according to the umbrella groups, this is probably the only time in the year that each group manages to meet each other and get to know what others are doing. I met a Singaporean guy who has been doing quite a similar research as mine only with different focus, methods and location. It is good to get to talk to him and learn from him too. And also to speak broken English!

Anyway, I get to catch up with some other friends and exchanging words of encouragement is such an uplifting feeling to get on with my work.

Hope we all will be successful in our studies.

Wassalam.

Farewell to Shaykh Abdul Razzaq Balhawan

Assalamualaikum warahmatullah wabarakatuh,

It is really sad for us today. It reminds me a lot of Rihla's final hours in Madinah. After finishing the teaching part, Shaykh Abdul Razzaq brought some refreshment for us as a gift for good. He has diabetes so he didn't have a lot but he never stopped offering us more juice and sweets. Fortunately we have prepared a set of pen & pencil engraved with his name on them as a gift for good to him. He refused to accept it and kept saying 'laa hawla wa laa quwata illa billahi' until Umm Hassan insisted that he finally took it and said that we have made him feel so shy. MashaALLAH, a very down to earth teacher.

His willingness to teach us is something that is not easy to get. Not that he is stingy in sharing knowledge but it is that he is too good that so many people are waiting for him to teach them. Some of his students follow him wherever he goes to read in front of him so that they may finish the Qur'an and receive a degree (ijazah) from him. The more students around him, the less each student will get to read from the Qur'an. Alhamdulillah, he kindly opened a class specially for the sisters. Though it's no more than 1 and a half hour daily, it is enough for us to read more than 2 pages a day including some lessons of the rules of tajwid. Of course, he gave full time for the brothers. Usually for a great teacher like him, those who want to learn from such a teacher will have to wait at the mosque. After the teacher finish leading Fajr prayer, then, the teaching begins. Usually from a crowd of brothers, each of them only manage to read 1 page a day. That's why I said that we are quite lucky, alhamdulillah.

If the mosque is willing, he will be invited to Cambridge again in Ramadhan. Before that, he will be judging the Qur'an recitation in Malaysia (but I won't be there). He said that he doesn't really like people singing the Qur'an because one will loose the tajwid rules, change the harakah, etc. thus change the meaning of the Qur'an which is completely haram as ALLAH asks us to read the Qur'an with 'tartil' (Surah al-Muazzammil, verse 7). It is fard al-ain to read the Qur'an according to rules (whether the person knows the rules or not). According to a hadith, it is recommended to read the Qur'an according to the rules and in our nature tone, or in another words not purposely beautifying the recitation with singing tone.

Anyway, I really am looking forward for his next visit to Cambridge, if I am still here. He said, for the next meeting, he will give us examinations. That give us about 4 months to practice.

ALLAHU'alam.

Wassalam.

Juzu' Amma

Assalamualaikum warahmatullah wabarakatuh,

Alhamdulillahi rabbilalamin, we managed to finish reading Juzu' Amma with Shaykh Abdur Razaq yesterday and now we moved to Juzu' Tabarak. He said after we have done nearly a month of tajwid lesson, most of us have avoided major error or 'lahn jaly' which includes the changes of harakah, tashkil and letters that may change the meaning of the Qur'an thus making it basically haram. However, we have not yet perfected our recitation so inevitably we sometimes still make minor errors or 'lahn khofy' which includes the little mistakes in makhroj and sifat that do not change the letters and meaning. For example when we read Surah al-Fatihah, the last verse, we say 'wa ladhdhoolin'. When making the stopping of 'dhod', there are 7 characteristics that we must pay attention and give right to or it will become an error in recitation. To say the sukun of 'dhod', one should not make whispering, no qalqalah, no stressing, instead it is a soft letter with the characteristic of lengthening, thick and take a bit of time to make sukun. However, if we can't make it a perfect 'dhod', as long as we don't change 'dhod' to 'zho' or 'da', that's is still acceptable.

Making 'lahn khofy' in reciting al-Fatihah in salah will not nullify one's salah but if making 'lahn jaly' and change the meaning completely, then it may result in one's salah not being accepted, according to the Shaykh. ALLAHU'alam. For example to say 'yaumi-ddin'. If the 'dal' is recited with whispering thus making it into 'ta', you literally change the meaning of 'Day of Judgement' into 'Day of the Fig'. Funny? But many people make this mistake. And another example is when saying 'Iyyaka na'budu wa...'. Some people tend to do 'duu', change from 1 harakah into 2 harakah because they think that the next 'wau' for 'wa' makes 'du' into 'duu'. Also in 'sirat', changing 'sod' into 'sin'. These are not right. May ALLAH help us in our recitation and accept our deeds.

This Tuesday will be our last lesson before Shaykh Abdur Razaq has to go back to Syria again. We feel quite sad today to realise the end of the course. Before we can say anything, the Shaykh said that he will miss us when he goes back. I nearly got into tear for what he said. Indeed he is such a sincere, pious, humble, giving and knowledgeable person. I, who used to be a teacher, can understand how this feeling is like. The last time he came was in Ramadhan and I studied with him and this time when he came, he asked of all his students who attended the classes back then. Who will not be touched by that? And now he will be leaving soon and he will most probably come back again in next Ramadhan if he lives long and the mosque here invites him again. He will not ask for payment but just travel expenses and accommodation, which basically is in the mosque. Such a simple and sincere person. I don't know if I will still be in Cambridge when he comes again but surely what he has taught us will, inshaALLAH, earn reward from ALLAH and I will try my best to embody his teaching and teach them in the future if possible. For sure, he has been given ijazah for tajwid and can be traced back directly to the the Prophet Muhammad (saw) through a chain of learnt scholars, but what he has taught me is way beyond tajwid and still is what the Prophet Muhammad (saw) has taught us.

May ALLAH preserve him, raise his rank among the righteous people and grant him Paradise. Amin.

ALLAHU'alam.

Wassalam.

Tell your family before you convert

Assalamualaikum warahmatullah wabarakatuh,

This news from Malaysia really got me writing. Our controversial PM of Malaysia asked all those who want to convert to make sure that their families are informed and then they can convert and register as a muslim! If this is the case, I am afraid that he will scare more people away from making this noble act. Not that it should be hidden from your family when you have converted, it is that your heart is ready to submit to ALLAH but you need time to think how to talk to your family. Considering to convert already has taken a lot of brain power to think and reflect, now you want them to also take up the pain to think of how to tell their families without getting chased out and cursed (if unfortunate)?

I understand that it is good to have the consent from the family because I think that is fairer to them but not many people can do that. For sure I can't and didn't. Conversion is not something that we can control (probably because he has not been through this process so he proposed this). Today I said that my heart really wants to submit to the All-Mighty One and Only None Other God - ALLAH, and want to follow the examples of the Messenger of God (saw), but wait! I have to stop that submission first and let my family know first before I can truly claim that I am a muslim. Is that what a conversion like? For sure, it is not true for me.

By imposing this regulation to have consent from the family before registration as a new muslim, it will only put off people from telling the authority. People just are not going to trouble themselves for a piece of consent letter from their family if they are not ready to tell them. Without the acknowledgment of the islamic authority (like a certificate), if the person passed away, it creates worse scenario than before this regulation because there is literally no black and white (only a shahadah taken in an old surau, let's say with two poor men as witnesses). There is simply no solid evidence of the conversion yet those friends who have been teaching this new convert know how much submission to ALLAH this person is and of course they would want his/her funeral done in the islamic way as well as any other dispute of will and wealth.

If you impose a regulation without any research or consultation from proper experts (I mean real expert, at least the mufti), you are only creating troubles. This is my PM who didn't do enough consultation with the proper experts in his coalition (the worse is consulted the wrong people) before naming the candidates for the pass election and caused terrible defeat. Read this piece of news.

Oh ALLAH, please save us from this mess and make all those who want to submit to YOU carry out their submission easily.

ALLAHU'alam.

Wassalam.